Tag: Muscle

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! parenting life photog Productivity

19:34 in office.  Haven’t written here in days, possibly weeks.  Miss it.  Need to design this area down here.  Like a startup hut, or hole.  All ideas, all centralized and no distractions.  The Nurse think it’s too dark down here, and she’s right, so I need to pull the blinds more, even though I hate that people can see in—  So maybe I won’t.  Not deciding now.

Nurse and I to the coast tomorrow, our new hideout in Bodega Bay.  Beyond excited… bringing laptop and journal, camera… going to look for architecture, and distantly walking people, no faced.

All photog… set timer for 10 minutes down here.  Bit over 7 mins remaining.  Need 3 mins to post,   Nurse and Emma talking at Oliver’s before batting practice, shopping and getting a snack with their professor.

Too many thoughts to convey now…. So waiting till later.  May type in loft, or put up fence so Henry can’t walk down the steep stairs.  Photography… Need more pics of him, my littlest.

Nurse and our travel plans, extensive, and stretching WELL into 2025.  Paris, Italy, New York, Seattle, Texas, possible South America.  Never had this before, this promise of adventure, and that’s what tomorrow is… ADVENTURE, one of millions more.  Seriously, that’s my mind.  For the rest of my life, a traveling set and string of stories with my Vacaville Nurse.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! Productivity

Kids out the door fairly easy.  Thinking of something Jack said yesterday about traffic,

“Traffic ’s bad now because all the 9-5 people are going home.” I found it sharp and easy, and deeply meditative his remark, asked myself why did he feel the need to share with me. Probably just that, wanting me to know he was observing.

And Emma, asking about the Nurse.  “Is she a Nurse all the time?”  I told her she is, and that she does have days off by the Nurse is always a NURSE.  Emma asked more questions about her job, the day-to-day, why some days are longer than other.  I suggested she ask her tomorrow night, which is tonight.

Already in a productive and fruitful rhythm this morning.  Simplifying… writing notes on Content Creation.  Using me as the client, the business… to get myself back in a classroom or on stage sharing ideas.  Marketing Self…

More notes.  All for the purpose of doing what one loves.  WORK.  And work that you don’t think of as fucking work.  Why look for a fucking job when you can CREATE one.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! Productivity

4.19.24

0647.  Out of bed around 0620.  Henry up I think but then back to sleep.  In my coffee corner, thinking of what to do differently today.  Writing taking a back seat, being more a reaction than the primary task.

So what do I do…..??? Is it sales?  Photog?  Tech?? Do I have to choose one or can I blend?

No answer found now or even in the next hour.  Thinking of the interview or meeting on Wednesday.  Could I have done anything different?

Have to wake kids.  0650

…..

0844 Peet’s is a mess.  Chaos, people impatient and asking baristas where their drinks are.

09:16 home and writing in Nook.  Nurse on her way, one page filled in BED.  Looking at my life from U-2 altitude.  Seeing all continents, people, interactions, concerns and occurrences.  Solving everything in this sitting before she gets here.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! Productivity

11:04

Sonoma, Peet’s Coffee.

Passport appointment done.  Now the wait.  Six to seven weeks they told me.  

Nowhere to sit here except this leather chair, no outlet close and I’m low on power.  So…. Shit.  Designing a new attitude and habit with everything from money to when I’m going to sleep.  Nurse and I last night calling it at a decent hour, she feeling a little under the weather.

Man walks in the same way I did, with work bag, looking around and realizing he too has to settle for the leather chair.

Meeting at 15:00.  Know just what I’m presenting, and the guy behind me is a sales guy more than likely and he feeds me ideas.  Not many, but enough to get me into AE character.  Not sure if he’s an AE or AM, but still what he says has me in character.

Maybe here’s an outlet outside near one of the tables.

Walk outside look around on small patio, and there’s one.  And there’s an outlet.  Holy shit, that never happens to me.  Thank all flavors of Jesus.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! Me, Wine Industry wine

Distracting myself again with wine stories.  The memories and old photos, people…. Not talking about it anymore, what I just mentioned.

Can’t even write it and I won’t.

Says int he tasting room, the slow ones where I’d just write and write, taste something on the flight and make up weird descriptors like “Cold War-era catcher’s mitt”.

The woman winemaker, my sister… what she’s experienced, her 20+ years with the winery… writing that.  I need more vineyard walks, to taste and note more.  Get back into it as I was and DO NOT stop.

This shot, from the Roth tasting room.  Early 2018 I think.  Remember this day specifically I think… slow, and we were listening to music and trying the current releases.  One, a Cab, single vineyard, had me interested and needing my notebook.  I scribbled and scribbled, went outside so I could still hear the music but not get distracted.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! Productivity Readings/Writings

Fairfield, CA.

Peet’s Coffee.

Music, something either early 2000s or late 90s.  Corny pop song, like one you’d hear when the credits roll in a teeny movie.  Not sure why I’m giving it attention, but the first detail to note, and more less-than-enjoyable tracks in my second Peet’s of the day.  Bad music in Vacaville too.  The Nurse and I had our laughs with it.

We made dinner last night, on the grill… veggies and steak, paired with a North Coast Cab from BR Cohn.  We listened to music and joked about possible wedding songs.  We danced and laughed, celebrated our freedom collectively and singularly, and acknowledge vocally how happy we are, and with not a drop of fucking apology.

HAPPINESS.  Imagine that…

Look into it.

08:21

Keep writing.  And posting everything to BDX…  On pic this morning of dog Oliver and cat Figgy by the glass door, wanting out before we leave.  Part of the morning “routine”. And we do have a routine, not sure why I put it in quotes.

Passport appointment made.  Drawing the rest of my life and now how I ‘want’ it to materialize, but how it fucking will.  And.It.Fucking.WILL.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! Productivity Readings/Writings sales-y

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14:14

Davis, CA.

Some pizza joint.  Working and prospecting, writing and responding to the communication of rolled clowns.  Seizing this sitting, this booth, this random pizza place.  Steve’s, the name.  Obviously never been here before and while the Nurse is at her appointment I told her I’d walk around.  Only got one block away from our car.

Focusing on my gratitude and strength, and how obvious some people make themselves.  They make it easy. Like someone told me recently – They are not allowed to have unfettered access to you.

So true.  Moving on…..  The day, beautiful.  When was the last time I was here, in Davis?  Oh.. with the Nurse.  We ate at a pub a couple blocks away, I think that’s where it is.  We had a burger, and talked and laughed as we did just before today’s appointment.

She makes everything better, I’ve said that since I think the second month we were together.  Today is beautiful, I’m deciding it so and she makes it easier.  So much easier.

Almost forty-fucking-five and I’m finding love.  Perfect timing…. The postmodern significance of this sitting, just realizing… me blogging ME.  Ah…

Choosing my flight.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! parenting life photog Productivity Readings/Writings sales-y

4-15-24

Errand before leaving town.  08:04, already a sweet note from the Nurse.  Henry still asleep, big kids up.   Finishing last bit of laundry.  Pinot from last night when home and working still singing to me, in a number of ways.  Not sure what it’s saying though, the precise intention or command.

Hear a weed blower or whacker outside, not too close and not far.  Landscaping, cleaning, arranging, much like prose.  Essays or entries compiled into a collection.  Fearless, that fearless feeling connects with me.  This new life, new opportunities and openings for whatever I want.

Centered, Composed, and again… FEARLESS.

Another writer and diarist on LinkedIN commented on something I posted yesterday.  Look to see who she is, and how interesting, her thoughts.  Emphasis on journaling, and life post-divorce… self-discovery, learning more about who you are through your own pages.  

THROUGH MADNESS, LOOKING AT YOU NOT AS YOU BUT A READER.

Startup mentality this morning, the kids and the laundry, drive to VV, the espresso, every bloody ingredient.

A new beginning today, as with all days but louder, more music to it, to ME.  Removing self from the excess of others’ words, presence.

Renewed Stoic strut.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! parenting life photog Productivity Readings/Writings sales-y

21:11

Day closing, but the kids don’t have school tomorrow and they are in party mode, not in any way interested in closing the day of business.  I’ll give them a bit longer while I catch up on things here in the nook.  Journal page for day, thinking of the Nurse at dinner next to me hearing family stories.  My sister telling me about an old family and wine industry friend who passed a couple weeks ago.  Odd, as Dad I were just talking about him.

Nice man, definite Sonoma County fixture, lived a full life but still.  Time, it’s not forever.  Sipping a Pinot I bought recently with the Nurse, looking at the pictures of Emma and Henry from earlier at the field, and it hits me, I mean really fucking hits me – THIS ISN’T FOREVER.

They’re going to get older, bigger, not look at me the same way.  It’s already kind of happening with Emma.  Obviously not Henry, being three, and Jack for a 12 y/o is still quite dad-honed.  Whatever though, it’s time telling me that it’s coming, and it will find me, us.

Hear kids playing upstairs, sip Pinot, seeing EVERYTHING.

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! parenting life Productivity Readings/Writings sales-y

Morning thinking.  More coffee first… posted to blog, sweet text from the Nurse that absolutely sends me into the exosphere…. Love this. This feeling of STRENGTH that I was just scribbling about in the BED pages.

Fool-born minnows still try to lower me and stop me.   I love it.. I fucking LOVE.IT.

Writing notes for meeting this week.  Again, maybe Wednesday they told me, not sure.  I’m ready WHENEVER.

Starting day tomorrow at 05:00, no exceptions.  Setting up office in room, will work next to Henry.  

Be.About.EVERYTHING.  All thoughts recorded… sales but not.  Prospecting but not.  Cold-calling but not at fucking all.  Diving into this as the Nurse does her practice.  Last night she again there late.  And again I laugh when others boast their ethic…. Really am grateful for the comedy.

Disappointment in self felt earlier, but remedied with self-talk, a long entry.

09:25, shower soon.

The Nurse and my thoughts of us and our time sending me to verse—