Back from leads meeting.  Brought my own coffee, and did something I haven’t done in a while… got a fifty cent refill with an old gifted tumbler.  It was in no way a refill, just the kid behind the bar knows my name and I played to that card.  So I thought about selling, and recognition, brand recognition yes but just knowing something or someone, and the proximal response.

Do something different with my prospecting, something.  One, writing more letters.  Calling less.  Write about Sonic, more.  Study the story and identity of Sonic.  DO. NOT. GIVE. UP.  OR, slow down.  Keep the motion and conversation tireless and as I was told, nearly promised, “Good things will happen.” This morning told by a member, Gary, nice guy who does loans and does a lot of business, that it takes time.  Plant seeds, have conversations, go out…

Lunch today in Novato.  Meet as many people as possible.

Working as well on a couple side projects, that aren’t really side projects but to the side of Sonic, of course.  Great lecture last night.  The whole time talking to these high school kids and hearing them narrate their plans to transfer and travel, me standing their wanting to do the same.  “Fuck it, then why don’t you.” True.  Why don’t you, I, we?  More life in the day, more life in me and life through movement, through what I do.

A wine project…. Going to take a coffee break here in a minute and write some notes on it.  And, target wineries that I want to study, learn, possibly help move bottles.  All these notes to self to help lift self off ground, gain altitude.  Wine, bridging that stretch in my story and all the wine world people I know, bridging it here, or something.  Writing freely in this morning’s early locomotive intentions with paragraphs and narration.  All over the place with my ideas and writings so far.  The coffee very much doing its job, and doing what I need it to.  Wherever I am in the project, I’m getting close to what I want which is that autopilot feeling in this new position, yes, and of course more money, but more than that, any of that, a reaffirmed and confirmed purpose.  The other day thought some of my writing and speaking ability was lost from some perceived block or mock-reality.  But no.  NO.  It’s all a decision.  All of this is a decision.  To do what you want, and what will get you to your There.  You reach a point where you’re just tired of it, tired of feeling a certain way, and the only steps you’ll accept are ones of a new beat and clef.

Planning to break at ten.  Just sent first email.  And now…. Hearing people in a meeting.  Signed contract just came in through email.  Celebratory, me, but only for a second.  Want to replicate that, transact, over and over. And I will, through creative prospecting.  And I’m getting sick of that word, prospecting.  So what’s the next logical word?  Is that word needing to be logical?  I’m overthinking.

Keep projects in perspective, and have each your project narrate a certain and specific perspective.  Show life in your work, show self in your work.  Have your work show who YOU truly are, the most truthful talk and form and finite framing of your voice.  You are the work, you are the projects, and through such you are FREED.

Day 9.  About conviction, about defiance, about all of us finding what we’re searching for.  Coltrane playing me and eased track.  Didn’t record my spoken word piece yesterday.  Was distracted by that bottle of Inspiration Syrah, the quiet of the house, and thoughts of writing about the wine industry.  When in my office, I see such a book taking shape, in not much time either.  Citing everything from the ridiculous pay, to the overwhelming focus on anything but get wine, to patterns and posturing from those patterns.
A truck passes me on 128.  Hate typing on my phone, but this is what I have currently.  Hoping for a day not at all busy.  Not at all preoccupied with the winery making its number for the month, but more my sanity, my sentences, this project and others.
This week in the office, I’m going to loudly and communicatively accelerate all movements and sights.  Why can’t I be the highest selling AE in my first year?  There is no law or rule or policy prohibiting such.  Actually, Sonic is the atmosphere that enables and emboldens such a progression to take place.  Whatever we do for work, we need not only make it our own, but have it teach us and be a measure of effort.  We should always seek to against ourselves compete.
Bed early tonight.  Wake at 5, 4 if you can.  At the end of 100 days, there will be a visual of such altitude, such attainment.  If I’m not the highest earner, I’ll have shocked everyone with what I’ve done.  Make calls, SET APPOINTMENTS…. just say hi.  Forget about return, certainly immediate return.  That’s a foot shot, I’ve learned, and an error the wine industry continues to seemingly want to make.  And I e never figured out why, why they expect such instant transaction and metrics ascension.  I’ve given up trying to learn, now focusing on my Sonic story and sense of new sense and story, character.
This writing spot, little spacious and sizeable inlet, used to write here in 2012 as I mentioned, and later in 2017 when working at the Foley camp.  Now, story is different.  Not at all fearful to question and defy regularity and policy, not that I was before.  But Sonic has shown me that one idea can prove purposeful and provide a purpose which pervades till your final day.  Such is now, such is me, such is my poetic and newly purposed immediacy.
What do I want from the day.  Peace.  Ideas for this week.  Ideas on growth, branding and rebranding but more than that…. CHARACTER.  Story.  Life.  Revolution.  Start acting like a revolutionary, I said to myself and some other people at Sonic a few months ago.  Today…. watch.  And won’t do so with malice or a burn-bridge intent, but to have my identity known.  For all in contact with me, not just for me.  If I’m not making sense I apologize….. you’ll see what I mean, shortly.