Not sure how many people I’m going to get ahold of this week.


Some people in department already on vacation.  AE friend David in the desert or something, and I’m not sure about the others…

People talking in hallway, distracting me a bit but I’m allowing that.  I allow all of it, anything that encumbers or obstructs…. The mood itself is conceptual, actualized only by me.  Think I get it now.

Outside feeling much like November, which I LOVE.  My favorite month—  Just had a thought of sandbagging this next impressive sale till December, then take vacation days before xmas… go to Tahoe— Wait what?  In that piece of shit Prius?  No.  Okay… then Monterey.  Much more doable.  Miss that little town, the restaurants and bar at Plaza.  Definitely a possibility… looking at room prices now…

When this all first happened someone recommend I take a trip by myself, think I wrote that somewhere here on blog.  Now, I’m set to progress in the idea.  Maybe Santa Cruz.  Hmmm…..

I am made and remade continually, Virginia Woolf said.  Totally feel this, this morning.  Remaking myself to just get on the phone and cold-call, much I don’t fucking want to.  Looking at word count of this doc… 301k.  At 21’s start I promised the average of 1000 words a day.  Little behind…. Can catch up.  Log every goddamn thought and post to blog regardless of potential for fallout.  

This will impact certain relationships with characters, the conversation with them.  But I can’t allow self to care.  It’s all about the work, the words, the self-exploration and making this AE story the Bottledaux story… the new Mike Madigan story.  That’s where my focus is… About EVERYTHING for this story, for the work, the blog and the resulting company.

Drafting letter to students…. Looking in email for any lead….  Found one, but already touched that one.  Okay… so now what.

The latte is fucking strong, oh my god.  Should I dump out the rest?  No… embrace it, partner with it.  It’s a love storm, an encourager.  More communicative than others, that’s for sure.