Group work. They pretend, some of them. But most are truthful and want to follow the prompt; they walk with each other in ideas, talk and exchange, finding quotes to prove their points, or single point; some even want to seem scholarly and here I am watching them, wishing I were them, looking for a thesis in the text, an idea, a noting, and argument; be inspired. I’m inspired. This is all I want, I think to myself, think my lips moved and a student saw, probably thinking I’m crazy, that professor that talks to himself. This is all I want. I’m not that bitter adjunct. I’m this.. that RADICALIZED adjunct. A bizarrely passionate teacher and writer and thinker and learning-lover; unable to stop– ADDICTED. And don’t find me a 12 step path ‘cause it won’t work.

(4/7/15)