Tag: fiction

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#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!!

11-1-24

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08:13

I did it.

500+ words already in my latest NaNo effort.  First in years.  The topic… yes.

Nurse still asleep I believe, but her coffee order on the nightstand next to her.

Kids all up and fed.  Me, out of bed before 07:20 I think.  Definitely awake, and in a novel writer’s prance.  Thought about the opening paragraph early this morning, like around 05:15 or :25, narrating to myself.

That hasn’t happened in a long, long time.

November, my favorite month if you didn’t know, and I need shit to change.  Almost immediately.

Getting back to wine, telling wine stories, the classroom and reading with students, developing ideas.  Not obsessing over a fucking funnel, and what the ‘MRC’ is.

Putting it all out there, for my character.  Me yes, but the one in the novel.

08:18, haven’t had a start to a day like this in a long time.  Keeping my daughter’s smile present in thoughts, yesterday when I dropped off her costume.  I want that level of smile, joy, freedom.  Like nothing’s wrong in this world or any.

Writing my way toward that.  And with a novel.  1,667 words a day.  So my journal entries should be short, right?  Save the energy for the characters…..  I know where he is going, where he will land.

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#blogeverythingnow

Sketching a fictional character, based on my sister and a story she told the other night about a

lawyer that was remarking with condescension on her winemaking studies at UC Davis.  I thought of her and the story she told two nights ago at Mom’s birthday, yesterday while walking down the street in Davis to the pizza place where I worked for about 35-40 minutes….  Then I noted winemaker activity, habits, the early hours that some just aren’t able to do, like me.

Harvest and what that means…. The clusters and when they come in, all that’s in the bin like bugs and lizards and snakes, Katie one time telling me about a large rat that almost found its way to the press.

Wine and fiction, more focus on the story itself than wine, or any tasting or scoring.  It’s not the wine, it’s the people, the geography, those vineyard walks I used to do every morning.

Continuing in sketching story…. 08:50.

-She thieves from the 7th barrel again.  Is something off, or is it distinct in some weird way.  Leave it alone, she says to herself.  Let it be, let it grow or change or…

Categories
#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that. Health/Wellness just writing LOVE!!!!! parenting life Readings/Writings

Just remembered tomorrow is my winemaker sister’s birthday.

08:50 sipping espresso, Drink Coffee Write Books/Blogs Be Happy.  The business plan from the mask mom bought during covid.  Sticking to that today.  Jack waking and immediately on his computer to learn more about his game and make progress, get to a certain level.  I can only admire his system and dedication, outlining of day in that regard.

Coffee brewing now, pressing the button a little over 2 minutes ago and still with the espresso.  Henry still asleep, single dad notes.  More notes, like the therapist yesterday.. telling me not to forget about ME.  My aims and wants, what I want for Mike Madigan.

I’m ablaze right now in the nook, just espresso, this laptop, phone, messaging the Nurse telling her I love her and good morning, and how I miss her and I do like I haven’t another human ever.

Three goals for day – Writing and wine Content, Photog, start new blog on WP but do NOT buy domain (yet).

Simple enough.  Fasting till after 13:00.  Laundry to put away.  Nurse leaving more clothes here and I smile finding them last night and this morning, put pile of both of ours on bed….  HOME.  Feels more like a home with her and the kids here.

A script.  Fiction.  Or short story.  Something a story… I don’t know.  Centered around wine and winemaking, starting with small batches or lots, then moving forward.  Some new story, for me, or a character, or both.

Writing freely at the table, looking up and seeing the flowers I bought Mom and the Nurse, still here.  And they’re still alive surprisingly.  What was that, two weeks ago?  Think so.  Teaching my mind and thinking process to move in new truths.

What do I want… where I am going… how do I get there and away from certain present attributes?

Onto the coffee in the Paris cup the Nurse and I bought somewhere.  Think in that Healdsburg shop.  Henry walks downstairs, intent on watching Paw Patrol, nothing else.  His focus too speaks to me.  I want more obsession, to be consumed by something, utterly taken over.

Categories
#blogeverythingnow HAPPINESS. Imagine that.

journal

3-4-23

Certain people are just sad.  And I let them get to me.  Why.. I really do need to talk with myself as Mom suggests.

The kids.. THE KIDS.  Watch them.  They have no like-worries or concerns.  Their concerns this morning: waffles, Paw Patrol, Fortnite, the rain and if it’ll affect baseball practice, orange juice with waffles.  Amazing.  I will be more like them, avowed.

Relationships… the topic in my head again, right when I woke up after having a dream about….  And how I miss her, and thinking of certain dinners or time spent together… can’t go there.  I want to, but I only get sad.

Switching—  To the short story idea, or longer short story, maybe a novella I don’t know.  Fiction either way.  Wine critic who just says ‘fuck it’ with his job and judging wine, the industry, everything about it.  Quits.  Takes some time off, write about Self, the mind, thinking and thought and what he lets himself think about, what humans tend to go over and over in their minds.

He was a Philosophy major, even getting a Master’s Degree.  Thought about teaching but never did.  The thought of grading papers terrified him….

Still working on the story.  Need to start writing it, in its own journal, or something.  No. Idea what the character’s name is… and distracted by those thoughts.  So I counter the distraction with another distraction.

Thought and Mindfulness…. Love of SELF.  Nothing wrong with that, I don’t think.  Arranging my attitude’s architecture in a such a way that negative people and their micro-blather in ill-composed jabs doesn’t land.

…..

He asks himself what is the one thing he wants from work.  How does he see himself, day to day.  He doesn’t know, and in that there’s a loud reward.

Peace, unlock.

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autre

Decided I don’t believe in titles anymore.  The first sentence or couple sentences or whole first and part of second or third is what’s shown first….  Can’t believe I stressed titling so much as an adjunct.  What a fucking phony.

Write reactively.  When something occurs.  Nothing occurs today… NOTHING.  1:17 and not one tasting.  Another loud motorcycle.  Goddamnit.

Hungry… but don’t want to spend money.  Been spending too much the last few days. Yesterday no exception.  Day before that, and before, and I think another before as well.

Little over $80 in wallet.  Maybe a sandwich from that place down the road, or the taco truck Justin took me to that one day.  That sounds amazing.

……..

9:36, home with a glass of some red blend my sister made.  Starting a new idea, written.  Yes, another.  A story… new one, new type.  Me writing… creating characters and tension, voices that are real but not.

Winery owner, old winery… just inherited, not wanting to do anything with it but having to.  Where do I want it to end, though?  Could go the suspense route, or cheesy coming-of-age way.  Not sure yet…. Get more into human mind.  What would you do if… kind of thing.

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photog

Belvedere

Nonpareil

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wine

more notes

…reports I do for the department makes me think I need to do the same but for me.  Inventory week upon its close.

Changed music, from LoFi to Tycho.  Been a while since I’ve played his tracks.

Called real estate friend Andrew to wish him a happy birthday.  He’s up in Tahoe I learned and didn’t want to keep him on phone too long so told him we’d talk when he’s back.

Another lead, of a different sort… developing.  New story…. The Mona novel.  Her novel should start with her at the desk, reading a wine magazine, or book…

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just writing

Vein Bridge

Transparency, did take a nap.  Didn’t know I was that tired.  Doing laundry now, not the most exciting venture, if it’s even a “venture”.  Trying a new way of drying, with a more gentle cycle.  Fascinating, I know, I just hate when my jeans come out all fucking creased and wrinkled.  My sister recommended I try this a while back, see if it works.

81 degrees outside, perfect for a drive.  Oh, need gas.  Nearly forgot.  Where am I driving?  Windsor.  Not in the mood for the miles to HBG, and the parking that’ll assuredly follow that drive.

Thinking objectively, see me and my story not as me.  Take self outside of self.

…..

Mike waits for the laundry.  Goes up to see how much time is left on this “gentle” cycle.

14 minutes.  May as well read 14 hours.  Laundry, easily one of his least favorite things in the world to do.  What does he love, he thought.  Drives, wine, music.  Then do that, he says to himself.

Mike lifts his head and looks outside, over to the neighbors down the street, right.  They’re in Tahoe…. He needs a drive like that, an escape like that.  Then make it happen, he writes on a post-it then placing it just under the spacebar.

He regrets taking the nap but then see it’s just what was needed.  Now he’s alive, now he wants more of the day, to get further into the day.  What is he looking for, with wine.  The story of wine and Sonoma County, and Napa too to an extent.  He wants more from where he is – the current story.  “I’m too old to be looking for new stories, or hope one finds me…. Use what IS.” he writes on day’s page.

Okay, how much more time…?  Still says 14.  What the fuck, he says to himself, then thinks maybe that makes sense, as it’s a gentle cycle.  Gentle minutes are slower than regular ones, maybe ….  This gives Mike a garrison of ideas.

Out the door.

Categories
just writing

9:10, tall latte and quiet, readying for Napa.

Chris and I discussed last night what our target is, and it’s admirably simply, honestly… Downtown Calistoga.  Told him that was a great idea after he mentioned it, and me telling him that I drove through there Thursday morning on a cruise…. “Did I write this already?” I just thought.  Senior moment, and yes I think I’m really having one.

Thought about shaving but meh….  Ready for day as is.  Trying not to think about certain intersections and voices.  Focusing on day, this one… tomorrow in the Caddis Room.

Had an idea about a novel, for a character, one I’ve been thinking about for years.  Never finished obviously and really never started or progressed much past notes and sketches, blog posts about her apartment and her art, her day job at the advertising agency in SF.  My uber driver just now, Santiago, telling me that life is short and he’s retired and needs to be outside, not on the couch like some of his friends watching TV for 4, 5, 6, 7 hours.  Told him I agreed, then felt self back with this character – Kelly her name was originally.  Thinking…

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autre

I wake at 4:56 I think the phone said.

Haven’t done it in a while.  But I’m doing it, I’m doing it.  I have to.  Now.  I’m 42, or this year I will be so in my mind I already am.  do something now.  Change habit, practice, thoughts on running.

How far do I go?  Don’t think about that now just get out the door.  Once out, the cold accosts me.  Goddamnnit, I think.  Get back in the house.

No, stay out, just start stepping.  Press START first.  Old Garmin.  Need a newer model, one that makes me more excited to run at such an hour.  Why am I doing this?  why not just run in the afternoon or at lunch like I used to when I’d pound out 8 miles or a touch more and be back at the desk.

I start.  Not as cold, almost immediately.  Inner beckoning for more, another street, another.  Before I can think how far I am the watch sounds and vibrates.  2 miles, average pace 8:43.  Not bad.

One street, a little darker than I’d like but I make myself continue.  Small shove of wind, and I think some drizzle.  It is.  Don’t wish for anything or curse any attribute of the run.  Take and be in concert with everything.

Mile 4.  Still no light.  Temp is not much impact, if any.  Slowing down a bit, more pace, more moderation.  Try to push to 6.3, I tell myself. Just a wink over 10k and before 6am.  Perfect start to day.  Start thinking about everything I have to do…. Confirm shipments, clean a little, get as close to open-ready as I can.  Opening in 12 days.  Everything into this shop.  Lot of work for what could be considered a side gig.

5.57….  Need to stop.  Feel something in left achilles, or just above it.

Stopped. Check time.  5.62, 9:03 pace.  Not not-happy, but certainly not celebrating.  Need to get under 9, and eventually, hopefully, someday, under 8.