Not before some writing and quiet.  In the Autumn Walk room.  Thinking about Friday and telling self not to acknowledge day name.  Friend posted on Facebook news of a friend of hers dying, certainly younger than me.  Why do I stress about anything, ANYTHING.  Be it sales or quota, teaching online (Last night by the way went beautifully with the 1A sections…), the shift, running, ANYTHING.  I’m enjoying and writing each day, everything that happens.

This new Mike Madigan and his story…..  Happiness, calm, Composition like I discussed last night and in the last leads meeting.  I put on some LoFi beats and contribute to what I want the atmosphere to be… I imagine myself in my office, writing for the day, for a couple hours then a run.  Today needs to be more than yesterday’s 5k.  Could I pull off 5 miles I ask myself.  Not sure.  I have time.

Happiness and being happy isn’t a product of or extension from perfection, I realize.  Not even sure balance has much to do with it.  More so, I see it as the dimension of self-peace… knowing your Beat, enjoying the character you are, and the story….  Posted all that to blog for 1A students.  This semester, another over zoom and email and the #professormikey blog, what can you do.  Just accept it and work with it I guess.  Not sure what call to make first.  Have to prepare a proposal for a new lead, one I was sure would be garbage but actually may materialize, thank the universe.

Mom sending me a video from her walk yesterday, showing me a writing spot.  Fuck, I thought, I should’ve gone up there.  Fuck sales, and Santa Rosa….  No, I then say, I did the right thing staying here.  I need to get up there though, soon, or somewhere.  Go on this self-Road trip I’ve been envisioning and toying with.

Do some budgeting moves, then in AE mode.  May take self out to lunch today, somewhat of a Friday tradition.  May, haven’t decided yet.  Need to fit a run somewhere in the hours.  Time now 8:25.  Huh, thought it was later.  Nice surprise.