8:51PM. Posted a poem earlier, which I’m quite sure I’ll use for the first poetry collection. Two Irishmen coming into tasting room today, reminding me that I have an ‘old country’ to visit. My sister has, recently, on a business trip, which makes me all the more envious of her travels. So many thoughts going through my head today, while behind that bar– oh, which reminds me.. I need to get some progress logged on the next FT app [Marin]– which also reminds me, that I need inform you, reader, that I landed my first summer assignment in 5 years! A ‘100‘ section, from 6-8:15p. I’m again getting deeper into this professor/Literary Life. And I hope it consumes me. I hope it ransacks any hope of “advance” in the wine world, if there is such a thing– And if there was, what would I care? That world could NEVER give me the career/Life I want. So I’m moving on. I already have.
Feel sorry for my brother, Blair, with those mislabeled bottles, his SB. I don’t even know how I’d react. He’s much more a poised person than me, the crazy writer.
Need a break. Blocked. The clouds, teasing me with rain thoughts, but I know that’s all they were doing. Foolish moisture plots…
Haven’t heard from my writer friend in a while. Not sure I need to, anymore. She’s hardly dependable, and her style’s underdeveloped, age-reflective, situationally-scattered. And she’s a student– Need to be more isolationist with these sentence trysts. Like this morning, with all the spoken words flying through my vision’s vortexes. The instrumentals, speaking to me in ways they never have, as I drove little Kerouac to his grandparents‘ home.
Ugh, if only I could remember all the inner voices from earlier today, from when I was behind the bar, tasting the Meritage for the eighth time, counting down day with that bloody clock. Well, one: the Dry Creek Disaster of ’10/’11. Why did I leave teaching for that? It’s alright. I’ve learned. And I’m so thankful for that mistake, frankly. That was the first step in truly exposing the industry’s ailments, and why I should be no part of it; how muddleheaded management is.
9:56PM. With night’s cap. Yes, another beer. And I find myself quite tired. Bringing my camera tomorrow, the little one if I remember. Want to take more pictures, use them for the entries as I used to. Something about photography that today so riled me. Must have been that group of 4 that Jay had in the res room; the one guy with that bazooka device, snapping everything from merchandise to his friends’ lifting of glass.
The still I shot in the tank room, swirling whatever red I had spouted.. making me think of my label, my own bottles, with my name– winemaker. Should I? Could be an experience, a story, like today in those caves, watching that barrel fall. And that’s really my push behind winemaking, or why I wanted to start making wine– decoding it all. IT’s not the majesty that everyone awards, really. This winemaker worship has to stop, as it’s us, the consumer, that decides the bottle’s fate.