needing more meditation, for tomorrow.  How I’m approaching the sakes story now.  Differently.  Trying to not say sales, or ‘RMR’, or quota, or even President’s Club.  

Then what do I call it.. what am I trying to do.  Like chemistry of mind and intention, blending like my sister does at the winery in her lab during “bench trials”.

Tired, broke sleep last night and this morning.  Making an espresso.  This Diet Coke does nothing, and tastes like metal false-sugar.  Gross.. 

Looking up random writing and journal prompts, just to see what comes up.  They’re all banal and appalling.  Where I am is more interesting, having me more fired up.. the peace of the loft, this home that is ALL mine.  Well, when my babies aren’t here.

Somewhere the is all mine—  Or more than that, the possessive of it, it’s where I can be in a calm sea of near-sound void.  No obstructions or voices… just the meditation of the moment.

People I saw in Santa Rosa around me, all with something.  Some case, some sadness, some urgency.  

Why.  

Life, far too short.