Kids outride playing carelessly, like birds just flying ‘cause they can. Class starts in just over 30 minutes. Well, office hours I mean. Tomorrow in the Field and I vow to stay there. Write observations, findings… Emma coming in letting out a burp, I laugh and ask what she’s doing – “Gonna get some water. How’s work, Dada? Are you done?” I tell her I’m not and type away. One of the neighbor’s kids comes over and tries talking to Henry who’s sitting on his mother’s lap. He laughs at her, and laughs louder every time the wind picks up. Emma fills her cup and I tell her I love her as she walks out. No response. Is she already embarrassed? I she already afraid her friend outside is going to hear me say ‘I love you baby girl…’? I’m getting old, and so are they. They are concerned with their friends’ presence and opinions. Jack certainly is, that’s no shock. But now, my little girl. 5 years on Earth, and aware of the Earth and its opinions.
I’m a parent, I have to deal with this – and WILL more and more as they age.
Glad I have this beer open. This is too much to think about right now. Think about running… running will be the always-distraction, the remedy and healer, the translator. Have to let today’s outage be blown away like the street leaves by this crazy wind. Not going to promise tomorrow’s run, or say what I’ll do. That’s what gets me into trouble. Though, note now, to self and you reader – RUNNING is the topic. It’s the thesis. It’s the EVERYTHING I’m About.
What if these pains don’t dissipate and I can’t ever again run as I used to? Well, then it’s something else…. Cycling, lifting, yoga, or….?