Just a handful of days away from my favorite month.  Or maybe that’s November.  Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.  Anyway, FALL.  I’m sick of Summer, and every year I feel that way.  Summer is a young person’s season I feel.  Man I am getting fucking grouchy at my mid-forties forum.

WIP call about to start, and I don’t plan on saying a fucking thing.  Enjoying my espresso, looking at calendar, 2 meetings much later in day.  Nurse texts me, I smile and feel better.  I swear, she is my book, books.  Everything she writes making my mind and vessel react.  Interesting… again, mid-40s and only now feeling this, what someone would call love or whatever.

Definitely needing more espresso.  See camera to my left, remember I still have pictures to go through.  Meeting starts, people saying hi and good morning, others like myself quiet.  No words.  Distracted by a pile to my right, one I got through a bit last night.

Starting a spreadsheet for expenses.  Doing it differently, everything with money.  Everything has to be done differently I’m telling myself.  Everything from relationships to work, writing, when I wake up, what I order for coffee and I need to take that out of the budget entirely both Starbucks and Peet’s except for when with the Nurse, when I write, my word limit and aim for the day.  

Seriously, EVERYTHING.