9:50 PM

Up since 4-whatever, but I’m still quite alive. Recent events, maybe… traffic on the way back to Sonoma County, monstrous. But what could I do? Really started right out of the parking lot on Davis, then really clogged before the GGB and stayed like a clogged artery all the way till Corte Madera, then was off and on till just after the Novato Narrows.

Not sure how many posts I’ll get out tonight…. tired but not, then the next blink I’m like “Oh my god I can’t wait to go to bed.”

Cap, sister’s Pinot, like the last time in this nook, where I used to work and write and collect at EOD, after everything started. And here I am, nearly two full years later.

No joke, thinking about calling in, this Sunday. Have a FULL day to self, from wake to pillow-lay. Remembering my talk with Ms. Kerri this morning on attitude and response and translation of words thrown at you.

Writing freer ’cause I’m so fucking tired, and it feels like cloud-speak, like I’m not touching any ground– Wow, this nook, this glass table. How much I worked and sold in here for Sonic, how much I wrote for self.

LOVE… Grateful. This life, everything that materializes. No one will talk me out of this joy, no matter how many barbs they bizarrely billow.

Rain tomorrow. Working from home, thank EVERYTHING. Listening to a Thievery mixtape. Always reminds me of the rain, being in my own tasting room on the vineyard lot I’ve for years dreamt of having. Writing from a patio, like the one at Arista, or just from my office looking at vines.

Make Pinot, maybe. Or do I stick with Cab… or my new connection with Zin, no more shit-talking and jokes. This is definitely the tired talking, I’m to side. Should go to sleep.

Just realized it’s after 10… bed. Thought today would have gone by with slug steps. But it was rocketed. not letting me note anything. Think I managed to fit in a few scribbles in journal, but here I am – Day’s end, about to bed.

Will have one more glass and listen to this Thievery mix. Think of my tasting room, the tastings I’d hold, what I’d. Don’t even know what sorts of wines I’m producing on my label. Let me run with that…

Sauvignon Blanc and Chardonnay, I guess expected but I like those voices so I’ll follow that. Merlot, Syrah, Cab. Yes I’m sipping Pinot and I like Pinot but do I want that associated with me? Not really. No defamation, just honest communication.

Focusing on self tonight, no other humans. No one. No matter who they are. What do I(!!!) want, what do I see for myself, where these tech sets step?

Anywhere close to a vineyard…

Think that might be a bit obvious. Just why I need it put to page tonight. The rows, each stage, especially dormancy when there’s nothing, only bareness and quiet – rain like tomorrow morning, cold, low clouds over a Sonoma Valley, pick one.