autonomy meditation — 4/9/12

Put a little more money in my startup stash.  Not touching it.  And not adding anymore.  Using all current funds to keep bills, balances inline.  Refusing to spend 1 cent on writing.  Literally rejecting the whole notion of overhead.  Going to start from less-than-scratch.  Well, that’s not entirely true, as I’ll be upgrading one of my blogs for video footage’s purpose, and my pandora account for uninterrupted sittings.  What should I do with this cash I have upstairs?  One thought was to buy a new camera, but I want to scale back the amount of visuals into this “blog.” As REAL books and logs, diaries/diarist writing, don’t have pictures, I don’t want these writings to in any way be trumped by a photograph, no matter how beautiful.  So if all I want to do is write, why do I have to save any money, especially with the poetry, spoken word, verse?  Will write my way to an office of my own, soon, so that’ll be paid for by writing that cost nothing to produce.  Business cards, hardly an impacting expense; Actually, I paid for the last 250 ordered [new version] with change I had accumulated in that big beer mug Mom and Dad bought me in Germany [think it’s from Germany].  Still can’t think of any overhead I’ll need to seriously consider.  Pens, paper, Comp Books, memory sticks…  Yes, overhead, technically.  But enough to have hide-away rolls of bills?

Not sure what to do in my quest for Autonomy.  You could argue that this is ignition funding, to get my wine-themed biz in the air.  But how?  What?  In what shape?  Me, at loss.  Going to forget about that money upstairs, consider it spent, GONE.  Going to stop writing about, meditating in its topic.  Neither in sight nor mind.  I’ll come back to it when fate so intends.

Going for a run in a matter of minutes.  My first in weeks.  Need to run more before driving to Alexander Valley, set up routine and time schedule quite serious.  Early A.M. jaunts would be great for entries, spoken word verses, or just speeded poems.  Write about my runs, as I used to in mikeslognoblog.  Speaking of the inaugural blog, or log of mine, I’d like to someday soon return to its moments, see what standalone’s I can pull, gather, perhaps for performing, reading at mics nearby.  The song I’m listening to right now, a remix of “Take It All Away” by John O’Callaghan, has little Jack completely stunned, interested, enamored.  He continues to sound at me, as if to say, “This is the type of music you should have in your Wine Bar.” So, should I research more, starting a Wine Bar?  Not sure that’s wise right now, to be honest.  And frankly, I’m hesitant to engage in anything that’ll take away from writing.  I see Self-subsistence as a scribe, first.  Then, when I have my own office and all monies have stabilized, excelled, then I’ll look at such ventures.  But, I won’t stop thinking of my tasting Room when I hear these songs.  So motivating how my little friend in front of me reacts to them, dances with cooed confidence.

2DO 2NIGHT:  1) Finish verses in Comp Book; 2) Print 3 standalone’s; 3) Enjoy thoughts, dreams of Autonomy, possible usages for upstairs cash; See Self THERE …