I will go forward with this re-focusing on my teaching for a number of reasons. One, is selfish, of course, wanting to feel that sensation of satisfaction, the feeling at the end of the day that reminds you you’re doing something significant. Second, the students. Maybe they should be first, but either way they are what keep me coming back to teaching, to the classroom, to grading papers and reacting to what they write for sakes of strengthening them, helping them feel more confident and comfortable in their reading and writing. And, to explore the act of teaching. The past few semesters I questioned if I was even teaching students anything, suggesting that I’, ore of an idea and motivation generator than anything. But, maybe I’m not crediting myself enough. Maybe I do actually teach. Huh….
When I was a high school student, my English teachers were a bit above average, looking back now more critically and as an educator of over 10 years. But one, Mr. Sullivan, my Creative Writing teacher as it happens, was the sole teaching character and presence that convinced me that teaching should be what I do. And, do forever, professionally and personally.
So I start a new trek, I guess. I’ve said this before, I know. But this is different. This time, it’s altogether unlike the others. Is it because I’m so close to 40? I don’t know. Maybe. But, just know, I’m leaving the wine world, industry and business, all of it, to teach. “He’s just in the moment, he’ll change his mind.” I can hear someone saying. No, sorry. Not this occasion. This isn’t just another occasion of self-realization or actualization. This is a decision. One definite, defining, final.
Still have my sections for Fall, at the JC. Have to order books, or select them first. If I WERE to get onto a high school campus by Fall, of course things could change. But, I would like to keep that evening 1A section, get more of my instructional fix.