Morning 1 with no little Kerouac. Feels odd, off, and I don’t at all like it. Went to new winery yesterday along 12, beautiful sight. Exploring possibilities, I’ll let you know…
Long day today, wine and teaching. No tasting today, just airborne examination. One wine in particular appears to be unhappy with its settlement, so it changes day to day, and with oxygen uptake, even more metamorphic. With my label, that will be embraced, surely, but I don’t know why this particular wine wants to change as it does. Is it because it’s blended? I honestly have no idea.
After Alice leaves for her class, I’ll do some editing, a bit more writing, and a bit more coffee-ing. Planning lesson while behind bar and I need every drop of energy I can locate in my current vessel.
More coffee.. had to turn the machine back on. Poems, all over my brain’s laces.. Kerouac to my right, reassuring me I’m going to step into a new facet and chapter in my story, and to embrace everything that approaches and eventually lands on my shores. This will get me to the Road, and enable whatever I want. It’s more than just a key, it’s an invitation.. I refuse to be like the majority of people breaching Gatsby’s galas, just wandering, no purpose.. my plan is more than mammoth, and the wick has finally been lit. I’ll be free, utterly, momentarily…
7:59, and I’m ahead of schedule for once. But I’d rather Jackie be here, distracting me. But I’m here writing, trying to distract myself with Self, my new reinvented senses of Self. Timelines, TIMElines.. all I read in this year, this new age. But I focus on what I want, finally, what I want to print, produce as a winemaker.
Printed three poems for first release– I know this is taking a while, I know, but I’m inching towards its printing, doing what I can when I can, with the little time allotted– I mean assigned, hate the word ‘allotted’.
Window open, I hear doors opening, closing, traffic, voices in the other condo cluster, maybe. And my thoughts return to the winery I visited yesterday– what should I do, how do I go about doing it, knowing if anything’s certain.. but the pull is commanding over even MY character’s confidence. So I’m just going to follow, do what feels right. Change.. never a negative, if you invite it. Outside noises interfering with the enjoyment of this music– and I just remembered I need to finish the latest piece in the ‘Tasting the Room’ column… So much on mind I’m dizzied. But that’s evidence that I’m living.. truly living! Not just existing.
As I said yesterday.. wine is about Life.. said to the people with whom I met. It’s not about constriction, copious pattern, and an obsession over ‘it’ being a business. We all know it’s a business.. so why the reiteration? It’s Life, Love, Passion.. negatives should be turned away, banished. And if they continue in their encroachment, they should be combatted, impetuously.. tigerishly.
And that’s my “mission statement”.
(6/24/14)