12pm

A different sight, appreciation and estimation of what’s around me.  How.  Walking to the park with Henry and seeing kids playing, their only priority.  How can one not find that admirable, enviable.  Hungry for lunch, of course, and wondering what would happen if I went and got something versus fasting.  How would that impact thinking, my thinking.

Those tacos sound so good though.  No, stop.  Not going to run, feel a bit of pain in right leg.  Or was it left.  Am I making it up, you’ll never know.

No decision in election, still.  Looks like Biden might win, but who knows.  All I know is that I’m hungry, and wanting the semester to be over.  Know I want to read more, write less maybe… Do I know what I want?  Jesus, I’m 41.  With three kids.  So what.

Had my first EVER piece of pumpkin pie last night, with whip cream from son’s insistence.  I swear, my first.  I’ve always thought that pumpkin turned into a pie sounded revolting.  I still do actually.  Have you ever touched a pumpkin, looked at one closely?  All those warts or whatever, grainy imperfections and scars and … is that mold?  Gross.  The pie last night, bewitching.  Cinnamon, rich but not too much.  Couldn’t believe it.  Pumpkin pie, me.  Not important, but terribly crucial in trying to access and explore a different channel in my brain, or just a differently thinking Mike Madigan entirely.

Just received an email notifying my department that one of the Senior AE’s is no longer with the company.  Should I be worried?  I should have a plan in place and I do but this is not unexpected.  Guys I’m a little protected being a new AE, and that I have 86% quota accomplished I think as of now.

This has me thinking.  Not worried, but enlivened.  Need to start certain projects that I’ve only kept as notes.  The design, the running project.  Like I said, accessing different cognition.  New philosophies and outlooks on, well, everything.

Don’t want to be his age and have to look for a job.  Creating my own.  Already have, really, but like I said – WITH NEW MIND. 

New sight and translation.  Every idea stems from another, and feeds the next composition.