5/14/20

Prius not starting when meeting was over and all I wanted to do was get a latte and go home, work.  Now, the work day is distinctly disrupted.  Everything I’m doing now is to replace that goddamn shitboat.  I always complain about it, but never do anything to step closer to a new ride.  That stops, and the steps to my new ship start today.  Everything else brought to ZERO budget…. Start charging for blogging services….  Calming now, after getting a latte and getting home.  Have to meet tow guy there in a little.  Day disrupted, but it’s still a day.

11:02.  Just like that, knocking on noon’s door.  After towing rumble is resolved, hoping to go for a run.  As long as I can go.  No wine tonight, or at any point.  Focus, production, speed and swiftness toward my office.  Only—

Back from taking car to shop myself for new battery.  And of course, it started when I got there to meet the tow guy, so tow not needed.  Already 12:10.  Not sure I’ll get in a run with a Zoom meeting at 1, then one at 5.  Desk a bit messy, thirsty and hungry.  Sparkling water, hold off on lunch I tell myself.

Couple sips into the Black Cherry can, and readying for my 1pm.  After that… not sure.  May have to get back to the car shop by then.

Just got email back from Karl, will read in a second.  3000 words is hard to hit in a day, especially in quarantine, like this with the covid cloud about our Now.  Stay on page, I tell myself, and think about the day after and after, after.  My shop, one with a value and principle belief in and allegiance to conversation, interaction.  Wine remains in my thinking, the shop images… but I want something else to happen first, I want the wine shop to be a wholly enjoy able ebb.  Not the only basket for eggs.  Tech first, wine second I note, and the tech has to be ALL written.  So really, writing first and wine afterward.

Want a sandwich, Oliver’s….  Could do my Zoom in the car, right?  Don’t want to do that. Did already this morning with the leads group and my presentation, which was really more a classroom dynamic, Q&A, but still me maintaining a thesis of making something up as you go, quoting Dan Jasper the first time I heard him speak, which I am, but am not.  This morning’s turbulent ignition has me in a web of electric self-finiing.

Jack in here with me, on the couch either doing a learning program, or watching a cartoon, or kids show on laptop with headphones.  Don’t care.  The house is quiet, and that’s what I need now.  Harmony.  A placid place.  Will email students, last night’s group, in a minute, speaking of beings in here with me… last night’s meeting was a reminder to me to be more ME.  To not think so much, and to have everything stretch from the contours of running and writing.

The day starts to slow…  cruising altitude, -esque.  With my quarantine view of our street….  Need a change of window views, street, structure, architecture in which I, we, live.  Take full advantage of tonight’s quiet, I tell myself.  Again, all work, no relaxing, no ease, no tranquility… well, tranquility in the production.  Keep the story developing.  No kids in the office with me laughing in a way that indicates a stirring of the crazy.