4PM.  And this laptop’s driving me to murder, or thinking of murdering it.  Up from a little-over-an-hour nap.  Coffee, right, brewed here.  Not sure if I’m running tonight as I may have to get little Kerouac and Addy from Ms. Lisa’s.  Feeling so odd today, like a decision has to be made, of some kind, or shape.  Wish I could take my freedom, what I truly want, living by my pen, teaching when I want, by appointment or booking.

A run will do me well, I’m sure.  The air.. but it’s scheduled to be down by the “creek” downtown, or just behind Railroad Square, where our first run took place back in.. February?  Can’t believe all that time’s just.. gone.  Gone.  Never again.  Not in anyway fair, in my opinion.

The coffee helping, but I’m almost done with cup 1.  Planning on a second?  Yes, of course.  I need to let my mind wander more, for my character’s sake.  She doesn’t want winemaking or anything wine-related to stress her, in anyway.  She told herself she’d allow deadlines of certain sorts in her business, when it was launched, but only controllable ones.. ones that wouldn’t kill the ‘fun’ of it.. “it” being the “business”, HER business.

Taking everything off this desk.  Thinking about “quality of Life” as they say.  Wouldn’t say I’m displeased with mine, currently, but there need be improvements, detailed ascensions if I’m to frolic in my True freedom.  And the poetry will help.. more of it.. each day.  That’s the way it has to stay.. yes, the novel is the first step, but many of the sprints ahead involve verse, knotted tributaries of odd meter.

 

I deem what I didn’t the other day, overt,

over the weekend when it was so busy I just

wanted to walk away, people coming in with demands, accusations,

questions, and just an audience, them seeking one,

I had to be it in their head.

Back to the front door, to the

clock, and limbs carrying me to a distance distance, I’m

finally distanced.

In a loop.  But what if I stopped, parked.

How would that affect traffic.  What

questions would they have for

me then?