by herself, me time to collect before a crazy day. Take Jack to camp, then get Henry from his other grandmother’s house, Emma with me then leave Emma and Henry at my parents’ house. Then back here to prep for 11:30 meeting with Mark and HR Director. Mark assured me yesterday he’s not upset with me, which I’m not really worried about but expressed I hoped he wasn’t/isn’t, so I’m not at all scared of being fired or anything like that, just hoping wherever I land in the company will pay enough, at least come close to my base in the Enterprise Division.
8:28, we’ll start loading up at 8:45 I just told the kids. Dad last night instructing me, or rather gently but poignantly urging me to let go and let things evolve and land as they may. Much if not all the stress and anxiety I’m experiencing lately is from me… that simple. Not being hard on myself or unreasonable I don’t think, just what I conclude from it all.
Yesterday watching Jackie’s all-star team practice from center field in the shade under the scoreboard, I thought about where I’m going… the direction of my story. Do I have one and second-guessing myself over and over, and for what. Excess meditation and measurement and deliberation. I’m a writer, blogger, love wine and the people that come into tasting rooms, the business itself…. Thinking the little winery’s a go. Shared the dream with Dad last night, and Mom, about how my story will conclude – me selling my wine telling stories about my family and the kids and looking at a vineyard.