Spinning Idiot

Drove out to get lunch, a poor boy sandwich from Oliver’s.  Had half, then decided to head to HQ.  Got there, no parking spaces, got annoyed, came back.  So here I am.  Just reached out to a lead, then another one over email, and feel exhausted from run earlier.  Can’t let it drag me… 5 miles of treadmill work tomorrow morning.

2:48pm, not sure what to do.  There I go with the indecision….  Oh my god I’m tired.  Must have been the goddamn hills.  It’s good for you, I say to myself.  And I know it is.

Taking a break, watch the news, take some notes….  Nothing is happening in the AE world and the more I try to force it the more frustrated and bitter and resentful my attitude molds.  Pause…

But then back.  My mind won’t turn off, it circles and circles, and plays with me.  Or more so, taunts me. Insults me.  “Why can’t you land on anything, Mikey?” it says.

“’Cause you won’t let me, you fucker.” I say back, and yes just how it sounds.

Watching the news, more on the “Delta Variant”.  Jesus, go away already.

Could use another drive, honestly.  To where…..