What I thought were allergies,

a strong hit of them turned out to be quite a cold. No run last night, not one this morning– sneeze sneeze sneeze sneeze. Yes, 4. I don’t see myself running today either. Just took a shower and am back on the couch, couldn’t fall asleep as I tried before, around 9 to get some additional rest; I’m just here, sniffling with my second cherry cough drop. Not finding the cherry stretch of it too convincing, more contrived and like some forced medicinal coating or coaxing of the lozenge. Not a fan of its sensory presence but it does strip the throat of discomfort.
Blanket over my knees. Don’t want to move. Don’t want sound, either. Just quiet. Yesterday at Arista wasn’t dumbfoundingly busy but just enough to have me putting singular words into that Paris journal Mom bought me, which I’m finding more challenging an assignment than rushing prose like this. I think “what word is in my head.. what solitary word do I want to put down?” I’m finding some duplicates, and some commonalities, thematically, but nothing reveled, nothing gemological, not yet.IMG_4989
Not in the mood to do anything. The adjunct is on his DL. I’ll be back up, running tomorrow, and actually running not just running errands. Planned to taste in RRV tomorrow, Williams Selyem, VML, and probably one other, one new that I haven’t before visited… Had plans today to have lunch with Dad, talk investments and real estate and what be, but I had to cancel. And of course this happens on my first day of this ‘vacation’ if you could call it that. One word in my head now, I should add it to list, the Paris journal.. in kitchen.. oh, “structure”. The concept of something having structure, that ‘it’ is structured.. both ideologically, tangibly, theoretically, conceptually. I want to one day build a structure, a house, for my family, like Dad did for us at Bayview. And then the structure of my character, as a writer.. my Literary shape if you would. And now I try to burnish my structure and mood, attitude, but can’t. I just need to relax, collect, get better. 14 mile run still on for Wednesday…
The quiet in here begins to hustle me to a touch of madness. Need a nap but my Self won’t let ME. A scuffle, questions and no answers just imagining how my day would be different if I weren’t sick. Fridge humming… me looking around the room, clearing my throat only to feel that uncomfortable and annoying scratch…..
Need to stop, try again to sleep. 10:28.. stopping. Breathing. No stress, none.