……..

14:52

So I had to give up the fiber lead.  Long story, and maddens me and not in the good way even thinking about it.

Nothing feared.  Not anymore.  Deciding something, and moving forward … not feeling any one way that I’m not selling like others, or at fucking all.

Know where now to put energies.  Won’t have time to write later so I fit in a couple words now.  Nearing end of day, and the writer compiling his confidence and conviction.  This year, where I get and do and free myself from whatever I want.

That simple.  Not letting any energy, whether good or bad, favorable or antithetical, make me feel one way or another.

Fires in L.A. and surrounding areas or counties, still fires.  Still being fought.  Hard to believe.  Seems like our fires, the 2017’s, were forever ago.  But when I hear these flames talked about on the news or radio, or while out or at work, I’m brought back to 10/9/17.  The early morning, where we fled.

The day has been weird, and this week I wanted to be a project was one where I excavated my own attitude and perspective, how I interpret moments, differently.  And now, day before the week’s last set of pages, I’m telling self not to care as much.

Don’t feel you always have to respond, and if you do don’t rush.  I mean, why?  What would it do if you rescind immediately versus 10 or 20 or 30 or 60 minutes later?