Haven’t been writing as much. Blaming it on this laptop, the one wife brought home from her school. Not used to its feel, the keys’ sounds. Easy excuse, easy scape’. Coffee and kids, Super Bowl Sunday, hoping to run as I did yesterday on treadmill putting up over 7.5 miles. Marathon this Saturday. Still don’t have motel booked. Jury duty possibly tomorrow, this week. Notice to left, going online to see if I have to “serve” or “perform” my “civic duty”. Never understood that, still don’t.
Eased day, today. Should have woken earlier, but that’s my consistent joke, isn’t it?
Don’t have to call in and check till tomorrow, I guess, around 4 or 5 or something. After 5 it said. Coffee, need more. Jack lets out obnoxious stretch with roaring sound either to get my attention or provoke me. I keep typing, learning poise and composition. Happiness in what I do, where I am. Not wishing for anything. Class tomorrow, grade papers somehow—Had dream last night/this morning, and I include this morning as the end of it ran up to me waking ot sounds of kids playing upstairs. Dream had me in classroom, first day, people filing in late when just before I thought I’d have a thin section and the department would cancel it. Told students that were coming in announcing how great it’d be to work with me again to sit down and we can talk after class. I even ordered the class to be quite so students could read what they just wrote during and in-class assignment, or prompt, something about Philosophy, or which thinkers, 2, did they find important and instrumental in their life. I myself wrote Plato and MLK. Explained a bit why, then woke.
When I teach Philosophy at Stanford or wherever, coming from teaching English at the CC level, of all levels of English, I plan to focus on Now, the magic of the meta, immediacy’s gravity and importance, first. Before addressing selected texts and other exercises. Definition, going back to my conversation with Bob Coleman in ’99, “Definitional Clarity” as he put it. Defining Self, where you are and what you’re doing. Does that presence make you happy… happy and health and the tie therein and of.
Today I feel like propelling joy and Equanimity into the world, in a multiplying and self-supporting stream. I often voice and repeat “poz vibez” to people in my life near and everywhere I can. This morning I embody it as I never have. There’s no reason for stress or angst, or frustration…. Jackie just said something I’d rather him not say and I tell him that’s not nice, and he responds, “Hey, you be quiet, Michael…” Usually I enter into contest with my little Beat. But not this morning. I laughed quietly, smile, am still smiling typing this sentence.. told them both I’d go to Starbucks and get what we all deem “Daddy Breakfast”. Some morning pound cake for little Kerouac and a chocolate milk for little Ms. Austen. Speaking of Jane Austen, I wonder if I can order all her books online. Want to lecture on her, or at least write essays on her work and read them. But I’ll start with Ms. Plath… “…If I’ve killed on man, I’ve killed two….” Sad I’m not lecturing on her this term, but soon again. Or maybe I can, print some copies of a poem, either “Daddy” or “Lazurus”. Ideas in tow and I try to inventory and get what I Can to page but they swarm with more frazzle and roam than I can wrangle. I go on with the morning, into it, and wait for the game. Today’s, and mine own.