I don’t mind that no one came to this optional meeting/office hour. Now I have a chance to educate myself on the day and what I want. How about that? I, actually get to be a student, go over what I’ve learned from myself this semester. Have always said that “professors” should consider themselves students of their own room, and see their students as colleagues. So I go over what I’ve learned. One, I’ve learned to be more of a student— take notes, explore, do research, read certain passages over and over. Two, love my work. Three, BE OPEN.
Looking out at the empty seats, I think of where I am in my teaching life. I never say “career”, as that implies ‘beginning and end’. I’m inspired this morning, and not in some banal way. I’m pushed to live my life as a student more, and to let everything in— all questions and answers, all scene, all opinions and assessments. This quiet is addictive, and what passes through my head is even more pleasurably imprisoning. Notebooks out, atop my backpack. I look at them between types. Me, a student. Again and forever and I wish I could spend the whole day in here like this but.. life.
What if I make this my life?