Reminded of my thought the other night, that my kids are watching.  They are reading this.  I can’t let this attitude and anxiety with work overtake me or even be present mildly.

Done with espresso and about to make some coffee.  Dinner with Mom and Dad last night, going through what we discussed, and how this is a different story now without a doubt concerning some people.

Desk is a mess, and I don’t care.  Entering receipts now and will finish entry when done…

Finally.  Won’t let them get that way again.  Say that often but this time I think I might actually mean it.  Do receipts at EOD, like closing a coffee shop.  Keep thinking of Noto and the feel walking in there, the barista behind the counter and that plastic shield, the area off to the left where you wait for your cup or plate.  Not saying it’s an easy business, but the feel in there is easy, eased.  If everything could feel that way.

11:10

Anxiety through the roof and flying all around me dropping reminders.  Me versus ME… this new me – Mike Madigan at an perceptive intersection.

Meeting at 1…. Should shave, get ready to speak, get in the mood and mode.  Tired of waiting for ANYTHING.  I’m just going to take what I want… be it money, peace of mind, more pervasive inner-peace, love, business, happiness.  All of it. More than merely manifesting.

Things could be worse, I keep saying to myself.  Saw what I thought was a homeless man walking on the side of 12 on the way to pick up Emma, then with news of people getting sick or losing their jobs as a single parent…. I have to be stronger.  The kids are WATCHING, reading, analyzing my character as I did in college with short stories and books I wrote.