Today I’m recalibrating.  The negative, THAT, that thing, that voice, that blathering serpent always returning, today silenced.  Or at least… asked politely to step outside, have a snack, and another, I know you won’t object.

And don’t come back fucking in.

Time to dig in, I said to myself.  SELF-Care and more composed this morning, working on the book but not stressing myself out about it – Publisher giving me an extension.

Feel like I’m in college again, asking for a just a couple more days, the weekend, to finish this goddamn paper.

Steadiness here, not forced, not rehearsed.  The most direct and impassioned Composition I can have these hands carve from the blank screen.

I decided to STOP, again… stop listening, engaging, giving these pigs what they want.

How does it feel?  Let me get back to ya…… (Like Dad says.)

This is maybe an addition to that idea off ‘agency’.  And AGENCY surrounding SELF-Care, mind actuation and attentuation of the outside seismology.

Again, those people that just won’t stop.  That are so convinced they’re taking a stand and speaking virtue when they’re really just the most vile and haphazard of loons.

What can you do, nothing.  Focus on SELF.

STOP, with giving to their being.

STOP, seeing them as a source deserving of your acknowledgment…

STOP, with them.

Done.

Publisher giving me an extension, and instead of panic I feel relief.  Strange, unfamiliar relief.  Running with it.  Not trying to interpret or build from some abstract principle.

Meeting in 53 minutes, I make another latte here at the house.  Nurse talking to a friend downstairs, the friend a bit loud but I have LoFi offering the right layer of cover and envelopment.

Annunciating the Now, how I need and want it, prefer it be.  They hate this… that I have such peace, happiness, love, FREEDOM in my life now.

One of those beauties of the process, when it works.  Latte and LoFi, new sky for me to imbibe.

The Bottledaux principle of freely typing like a mad man, like Kerouac… like the mask Mom gave me during covid which simple reads Drink Coffee Write Books Be Happy – 

And here I am, DEVIL.

Unable to be touched or shoved one way or another.

Their remedial attempts become more obvious, pathetic, and comical.  And yes, this is here for them to estimate however they’re able.  Their ability to understand, not a concern.  The remedial will stay such.