And not just running, but getting in a level of shape and condition physically that I haven’t held since before covid when I’d do 8 miles at lunch and not feel anything.
I remember getting back to the office feeling so proud, like there was no one in the office that did what I did at lunch, and couldn’t. I was the one.
I want that feeling again, and I will attain it.
13:48, not sure what to do. Could make calls, but won’t. Nurse and I leaving around 16:00. Stepping away from this laptop, I have to…
Or not. Force myself to write through this bland scene and room. Nothing bland about this room though, what the fuck am I talking about?
Getting the kids Sunday, and I cannot wait. I miss them terribly and am unable to communicate with them, and not from any choice I’m making. Can’t go on about it, it’ll just make me sad.
Changing the subject to………. Teaching. Again. How do I get back. What text do I start with? Alchemist. Tired of Road, and Bell Jar. Irby and Lawson, want to keep reading them. I don’t know, I need Newness. And lots of it. Any regularity and plain old repeat blah blah is driving me nuts.
So stop.
Cold turkey.
That simple, right?
YES.