notes

Errands done.  Got a Chardonnay for the night…. Getting up early with wife, tomorrow.  So not too much wine for the writer.  Have to write VLJ letter, and have that be more a consistent staple.. in fact…..

Semester starting next week, harvest starting its swings, me with more projects and pictures and writings than I can inventory, but I know I have to or, and, learn to.  Having a beer here in the home office, waiting for wife and babies to come home.  Emma this morning crying when I handed her off to Ms. Beth, screaming “DADA… DADA…” My heart and self and soul and all of my fortification crumbled right there in front of Ms. Austen and her little classroom colleagues.  I’m fine now, after this ‘Little Sumpin’ Extra!’ but I still can’t shake that cry, and the hurricane like twirl and shove of understanding that I am a father, I need to produce from these projects, all these creative efforts.  Luckily, this new winery “management” post has provided somewhat of a lucrative platform for me to explore new wine approaches as well as writing and photog’ paths.  I’m not denying my fortune, believe me.  And with this new semester, two 4-unit classes…. the year’s remainder is set to sow its own narrative.

Hear those wind chimes next door, has me thinking of this coming September, month’s end when Alice and I head down to Monterey for our 10-year.  And that too has me thinking of time and how it’s passing quicker than I want it to but time could care less, could and couldn’t care less, about my sensitivity to its indifference, and its 100% success shape.  Day’s begin, and they end, the calendar forward gallops and we can’t do a thing about it.  Pictures of clusters from yesterday, with my tour around the property with those amazing Texans has me thinking again about my vineyard.  Do I want to buy in AV, RRV?  Kenwood?  I’m a dreamer, and that’s just what I’m going to encourage my students this semester set themselves in… dreamer mode.

notes

Sometimes you get what you get.  Today my treadmill speed work was interrupted by a call from Jackie’s new school.  Don’t worry, he’s fine.  He told them I was picking him up as he thought early, when really he goes to a helpful and fun, really quite neat after-school program put on or, and, sponsored by the YMCA.  I only tallied 3 or so miles, and I’m not sure much more than 30 minutes.  Tried getting back on the belt but my head was no longer there, in the gym, on that tread with me, in runner/fitness/exercise mode.  So I left.  Part of me wanted to be mad or frustrated, whatever, but, again I learned… that’s what I had, that’s what happened, and that’s with what I’ll work.

On the couch sipping what’s left of the sparkling dark cherry, and in the mood for an iced coffee…. should take stuff with me to coffee spot and work there.  Or, just stay here.  Work here.  Don’t move from the couch.  Stay here in this intense quiet and cook, work with ideas.  We need time like this, as you know I believe.

Five days from now, Fall launches.  I will use this semester to not only collect my own lectures and compile some educational manuscript, of some kind, but form more of a business plan for myself.—  And just like that, the exhaustion sets in.  From waking early with Jack and Emma, and the little run I had.  Only had a light lunch and I think that’s all the writing daddy needed today.

Should go get some coffee… hit the office supply store—  NO.  Stay. Here.  Don’t. Move.  Stay working.  Finish this goddamn book, already.  What I should do is go get some coffee for the house, so I can wake early and get some writings done for the coming semester…. I’m a mess right now, if you must know.  So much on the writer’s thought-plate.  Went in this morning to the winery and processed some big orders from yesterday and had a meeting across the street.  Always moving.  Should go to campus, really.  Order books and get that done…. Yes, I’ll do that, I guess…. Or, not.  Just left a message for the bookstore manager and hopefully he’ll give me a call back soon.  If I don’t hear from him within an hour I’ll call back.

So, more or less ready to go, for the semester.  Just want to get some writings done…

for 100 & 1A:  I ask this every term, “Why are you here?” I know you have to take the class for whatever reason, and I know what the school and the English Department say… but what do you say?  What do you want from this class?  Many answer either, “I want to be a better writer.” Or, “I want to learn to read better.” ‘Better’, is good.  But I offer you should aim to be a stronger, more confident and comfortable reader and writer.  That, is what will make you “better”…. We have so much going on in life, so much that takes up so much of our time… other classes, work,  social engagements, family.. oh, and what about that old thing called ‘time to myself’?  Remember that?  No.  Being a student is NOT easy.  But that is the very reality of studenthood that should motivate you, keep you animal-like and hungry.